Causes of Grief

No matter what the source, grief is painful. Death is obviously a major cause of grief and may be the greatest contributor to our sense of loss. However, there are so many other reasons we experience grief and pain. It’s so important to realize not all losses have to do with death. The following is a list of some other losses; you may have additional experiences that have caused pain in your life so keep in mind this is not a comprehensive list.

Separation
Divorce
Moving
Disability after an illness or accident
Miscarriage
Loss of property (something important lost, destroyed, or stolen)
Loss of relationship or love
Loss of security, job, freedom, self-esteem, status, finances, trust, innocence, hopes and dreams
Recall Previous Losses

Each time we experience a new grief, the pain may be compounded as we are reminded of our previous losses. This is normal, and although it may be painful to remember, it can actually be helpful. It may seem odd and downright uncomfortable to intentionally think about past hurts, but reviewing the course your grief has taken in the past will help you with your present pain. As you reflect on past hurts, examine your reactions. How did you resolve your grief with each one? Did you resolve your grief or just “sweep it under the rug?” Sometimes we feel it necessary to ignore the hurt, or it could be just too painful to deal with the grief at hand, so we hide it for a while. We believe that once the pain is hidden, we can continue on with our lives because the grief isn’t there to cause us trouble. But it is still there! You didn’t eliminate the issue… you just moved it. Grief may be temporarily hidden, but it will always show back up until you deal with it. So as painful as it may be, you need to recall your previous losses.

Identify, Recognize, and Work Through

With all of the painful issues of your life brought into the light, you may feel that so much grief should be left in the dark. Not true! The good news is that you can overcome these painful issues and prevent them from ever becoming future stumbling blocks. You are strong enough to deal with each issue from the past. You can resolve old issues that still cause you pain and you will release them. You will now effectively deal with each grief as it comes, refusing to hide it. You will make progress in your grief journey if you just keep moving forward! Keep proclaiming those positive affirmations and follow these steps that can help.

1. Identify your losses throughout your life, all of them, not just the most recent one. Many kinds of losses can affect you deeply so think fully and completely on this. There may be devastating losses or smaller ones that still made you feel bad; identify and recognize them all.

2. Think about how you survived past disappointment and trauma. Reflect on how you dealt with the pain at the time. Be encouraged from your past recoveries and start working through any remaining hurts. Once dealt with, most hurts just become memories with no pain associated with them.

3. Working through the pain and grief can take time and can be carried out in many different ways. You may want to talk to a trusted friend or family member about the grief you have recognized. You can also journal your feelings or participate in cathartic activities such as exercise, music or other arts. You may try prayer and take your concerns to God. (He is always interested in hearing from you in your time of need.) In some cases, professional or spiritual counseling is recommended.

Working through grief takes time and energy but it’s difficult to even begin your journey toward a healthy future without first recognizing and dealing with your past.

For the sake of example, let’s use someone who provides services of designing smart phone applications. It is very in demand; however you have just started in business and desperately need clients. Believe it or not, your first step is designing business cards. Yes, those old fashioned, 8 track, analog seeming, physical business cards. Here’s why: sometimes your encounters with potential clients are so brief that you do not have time to take out smartphones and exchange web pages or phone numbers. Even though our sample entrepreneur provides a very high tech service, if his encounter is too brief, he needs to leave the potential customer something with his phone number. It’s a common mistake that some make; they think that people don’t like those clunky space consuming business cards in this modern age. Even if they don’t, when your service offered is something they want bad enough, they WILL save your card and call you back.

The second step in the situation of an entrepreneur is confidence. It can sometimes be very difficult when you are bleeding revenue, are in the red, or maybe do not have a single client yet. If the bills are going unpaid, if your life is falling apart, and the stress is eating you up; you’re going to have to suppress it. After reading around the web a lot we have found that one of the easiest ways to do this is when you are talking to a new person who may be a potential client, pretend that they have already paid you and you are thanking them. Everything is great, your smart phone apps are the best in the business, and you are getting ready to go cash their check. If you don’t, they will see your insecurity and may not be willing to hire you. It’s a vicious environment out there, and no matter how friendly people may seem on the surface, they are inwardly judging you at every second. Instead of saying “I really need the work, I hope you contact me”, try saying, “Excellent, I do believe that I am free, hope to hear from you soon”. Desperation is sensed, and fighting the urge to look desperate at the workshop or meet and greet is going to be your biggest asset in the battle of selling your own business.

As eager as you are to tell people that you create the coolest smartphone apps on the market, remember it is also key to listen. The bubbliest of personalities can really shoot themselves in the foot when it comes to presentation. If you know that the person you are speaking with at the workshop or expo is potentially one of the biggest purchasers of your apps that you make in the state; don’t bombard them; it is more important than ever to let them speak about what they want to speak about first, even if it is their vacation to Idaho to see potato fields. Then after some obligatory listening, you can let them know that you just launched your app creating venture. The client you want to land most may take some time, it will be important to have smaller jobs to tide you over. This is a very difficult time of any business, as some of the smaller clients may literally treat you worse and with less respect than the big fish you are after. You just have to handle these situations with grace, and you WILL know when it’s time to cut them loose. However they are invaluable to pay the bills on your way up.

If you are a job hunter seeking an hourly wage job in the world out there, no matter what anyone says, it is still like walking in a field full of landmines. One good word of advice is that even though we hate to say it; these days if an employer is just desperate to sign you up and have you start tomorrow; they may not be telling you what the job entails. Right now employers get their pick of talent no matter what the media tells you, and if they are hurriedly filling a position, it may be getting ready to be outsourced soon or simply be a very toxic environment.

Another thing to know is that we have been told over the last month that some employers are now taking their applicants through as many as SIX interviews, when the standard used to be 2 or 3. Yes, this can be very demoralizing; and you also have to answer questions from multiple people firing them at you. It is best as always to just be yourself, as cliché as that may sound. The main thing that your objective to let employers know about you is that you are going to help save them money. They do not care about your violin lesson teaching on the side, or softball league through church. It’s only the bottom line, and it will be this way for quite a few more years. As far as the current climate, without trying to sugarcoat anything; another tactic is that when the interview is over and the hr manager is thanking you for your time; you can always say outright, “Well I am interested in the position; is there any way to move things forward at all?” what happens is that when the interview is over, the applicant leaves, and sometimes the hiring manager has no idea if the applicant really wants the job. We live in a world where everything in life is full of headgames; swashbuckling your way through them is really more of a battle than doing the job every day once you land it.

I see it all the time. You are a great guy. You have a lot on the ball. That’s how you got that girl to pay attention to you in the first place. Now you’re married or you’ve been going out for a while and her attention is wandering. She’s nagging more. She’s not hanging on your every word. Not worshipping you like she should be. What’s a superhero to do?

After you’ve designed your man adventure, the next step I recommend is that you give thought to how you present yourself.

In this article I’ll give you 5 steps to go from being neglected and over-looked, to getting the attention and attraction you deserve.

1. Get The Heat Off. You need room. Stop sharing every bump in the road. Honey, you’ll never guess what happened when I tried to connect the sub-warp inertial dampeners to the trans-dimensional drive shaft… That’s your adventure. Sure it’s cool as hell to you and you want to share it, but you need to understand: She’s bored with the details. Especially when it’s been all dream so far. When you’ve got it up and running… When you’re ready to send that first prototype from here to Kansas at Warp 2..even then. Save it. Until you’ve got something solid. Something she and others can see.

2. Start In Secret. And make it practical. Okay I know you’ve cracked the quantum limits on sub-space travel. Your theory proves the existence of hyperspace. Or you think you can double the horsepower of a standard engine with a simple modification. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is what you can do. Right now. In the next two weeks. Give yourself the challenge of taking part of the project and proving it can happen, by… well… making it happen.

3. Build Credibility. Give yourself two DAYS. That’s right DAYS. To do something. Anything that creates results. The kind of results you can hold in your hand. The kind of results you can take to an expert in the field and get him to notice you have something here.

4. Get Legit. Arrange a demonstration. Don’t tell the wife about this one. This is the test run. If it works out give her a real downplayed version. The guy at MIT liked my demonstration. Says he wants me to come by next week. It’s nice, but still a long way from success.

5. Create Momentum. Don’t let a month go by without getting practical hold in your hand progress. Test. Redesign. Re-test. Reconfigure. Test. Tweak. Test again. Be relentless.

Your Man Adventure is important. The world needs it. It’s your responsibility to help them understand and appreciate it. Especially when it comes to your woman. Give her a front row ticket to your awesomeness in a way she can get excited about.

Does she think she has you all figured out?

Treats you like you are old news?

My FREE guide [http://www.secretidentityhq.com] will help you learn to…

Access and express your feelings.
Unhook from trying to impress her
See her rejections as cute
And awaken her inner pornstar.

Some girls are very easy to please. Most of them are easily thrilled by surprises but they all love gifts.

Whether it is a designer bag, jewelry or even a simple bouquet of flowers, you can expect her to give you a very positive response and show some gratitude. Aside from tangible gifts like cards, jewelry, bags, clothes or flowers, what is that special gift you can give her to express your affection, appreciation and the fondness you feel for her?

Why not offer her a totally different experience?

There are a lot of online gift services that offer new thrills for the creative, adventurous, romantic or active woman.

Imagine… a private wine-tasting and a journey in a vintage car, skiing or snowboarding at the world’s most beautiful ski resorts, experiencing a makeover from a leading stylist, a photography tour, exotic food and dining experiences, piloting a helicopter, experiencing the thrill of riding her first wave, or maybe experiencing the pure luxury of a romantic cruise! These are just a few ideas for something different to give to that special girl in your life.

Imagine her absolute delight when she receives a gift similar to any of those listed above!

Creating a flawless and easy-on-the-budget travelling experience to destinations and locations in other countries like Canada, Australia, China, France, Germany, Italy or Greece can be quite a difficult task especially if you are unsure where and what to visit, or how to arrange accommodation and what the main tourist attractions are.

How about taking advantage of an online travel-adventure voucher service to help you find the perfect travel itinerary to some of the most interesting countries in the world? Everything is pre-arranged and meticulously organized!

Sound easy? Well it definitely is.

With just a few clicks of a button on your keyboard, you can find that perfect destination with a lot of activity options to choose from, all well-organized, hassle-free and a very convenient way of planning that dream-adventure experience for your special girl.

This special adventure-experience will be so easy to organize; with just a few clicks of the mouse, you will be able to find the activity you fancy, with the details, the prices and a quick description of what your favourite girl can expect from the specific activity.

These travel-adventure sites can be highly innovative and very tempting. Usually they have a very hassle-free voucher service that allows you to choose your global dream destination along with a list of exotic, culture-oriented, art-oriented or physical activities that will make you go “wow!”

These can be very affordable, yet classy and memorable experiences the love of your life will surely enjoy, from wine-tasting in Chile to staying in an igloo in Switzerland, to private ice climbing in Canada, to visiting the spice bazaar in Turkey or shopping in style in Singapore – you can never go wrong with a well planned travel voucher as a present.

Step out of your usual comfort zone for gifts and make a change. Why not offer something both of you could enjoy together? Don’t delay, go and start looking for your dream destination and book that travel voucher today!